5A and 5-Jay Send Chip Into the Land of Being Married- July 1, 2006

There's the happy couple. Our good buddy Chip and his wife Virginia right after they got married at their reception at the State Realtors Building in Flowood. However, since me and Jay were in the house, you know this would be no ordinary wedding reception. First of all, anytime there's beer, food, and music, you know Pigott will not be able to resist any of the three. However, way before we got to this point, Jay and I had already started raising hell. First of all, let me give Cooper some credit. We were told at the rehearsal that there was a no alcohol policy in the church. Being the good person that I am, I kept to this policy and didn't bring anything in the church. However, Cooper thought nothing of it and pulled it out behind Dr. Aquila's back while he was talking to us just to hide it away right as the reverend turned around. Even before this, I was laughing at Jay just because his mother, the famous Charlotte Hudson decided she wanted to "get Jay's chin" after he was done shaving and sliced a fucking artery in poor Jay's neck leaving blood stains on his shirt. Needless to say, the red contrasted the yellow ties and vests alot thus making Jay the odd man out. Anyhow, after a short ceremony in which the two young bucks exchanged vows, it was time to party. First, Jay, Lee, Anna and I had to pose for a quick photo, but then it was off to the party of a lifetime- free food, free beer, and dancing. I mean seriously, do two guys need anything else to be happy? Well, once the food was brought out, I threw off my tux jacket and I dashed across the room like a kid on christmas morning. However, this was after the dumbass DJ called me "Greg Pie-go". Ya know I told him TO HIS FACE how to say my name and he still fucked it up? What a moron! Oblivious to the small children who were waiting patiently in line to eat something, I simply broke in line and shoved them aside to fulfill my own hunger. When Virginia's little cousin tried to get up near the food and looked at me funny when I broke in line, I said very politely, "what? I'm fat!". While I was off doing this, Jay was off surveying the beer area patiently waiting for Bill and Charlotte to leave. While we ate, sat, talked, and discussed, Bill all of a sudden pretended he was a lifelong friend of the Aquilas and then promptly left and mumbled something to them that no one could understand as he and Charlotte left leaving me and Jay to our own devices. By this time, I was on beer #2, but Jay being the champion he is would need little time to catch up. By this time, I was steadily drinking free miller lite in front of several of our church members, kids, and people like Brett Mayfield who were leaders in our youth group when were younger.......CARED! It's a party boy, so you have to act like it's a party. Shortly after this, I began my famous "Pigottrena" dance to the Macarena, and even though everyone says otherwise, I WAS NOT DRUNK at this point- that would come later, on the cha cha song. Anyway, Jay and Chip were busy taking pictures of themselves drinking and catching up in a great big hurry to Pigott because we all know that in our tag team, I'm the eater, and Jay is the drinker. However, when there's music playing and people dancing, Pigott gets loose- as you can obviously see. Anyway, the day was topped off with me eating 2 or 3 more plates which led to Cooper calling me out as being fat in the best man's toast- usually I would care, but Cooper was only stating the obvious, so I can't get upset. This led me to need more liquid in my system because of more food. The whole crowd was then entertained by my rendition of the Charlie Brown dance on several songs that had no business being danced to in that manner. However, the highlight of the reception was me getting my drunk ass on the mic to sing "Dixieland Delight" to everyone. To top it off, Jay Money did random tradition #15, and being an obedient little Pigott, I took the beer without missing a beat, took a sip, and kept on singing, but seriously, I was singing for the new couple. After a long day of standing, sweating, singing, eating, drinking, eating, drinking, and dancing, it was time for all of us to go our separate ways again, and for Pigott to go to Tennessee. Here's to you Chip and Virginia, we salute ya.